Training Toddlers To Sit In Church, Exposing Our Kids To Evil, Third Trimester Sex . . .Q&A

Nov 07, 2022

How and When do you bring awareness of evil and the fallen state of the world since our kids are home with us? I feel they are oblivious to hurt, wrong, and evil in the world.    

In the early years, that is the beauty of parenting children in a sheltered environment. Like a giant oak tree, we get to shade our children from the burning sun, and protect them from the harsh elements. Children know the fallen state of man in their own hearts, and when they are young, good books of martyrs, missionary's, and men/women of courage will provoke conversation about hard and dark truths. 

Our children are too fragile to bear the full weight of a fallen world without being crippled by anxiety or sorrow, OR becoming callus to the pain and suffering to cope. Actually, all of us are too fragile to bear the full weight of a fallen world. It is impossible to be aware of all of the evil in the world and unhelpful to try. I know that is beside the point but it may be helpful to keep in mind. 

As they grow we begin to show them the world not by sending them out in it, but bringing it into our home. Even now we have neighborhood children and families come over for lunch who are separated from parents, whose relatives have died from overdose, who suffer with loss and pain in a very real way. 

Not only are we able to love on these children. But we are able to have conversations with our own children about our fallen world. 

After opening the doors of our home, we walk out into the world WITH our children. We serve, we visit at parks and public beaches . . . and our children learn from those who are raised unlike themselves, with us standing by, listening, watching, still protecting. 

And slowly they will start to learn about life themselves, God-willing with open-forum-communication with us that was built with small bricks of trust laid over the years, that let them know they can talk about anything with us. And we pray they will. 

Sin should be shocking to us. But like everything else in parenting, our goal is an imperfect, yet smooth-as-possible onramp to the speeding freeway of life. 

We can let them be little. But have enough hard conversations with them so that they know when they stumble upon anything, we are there to answer, and discuss, and encourage. 

How Do You Have An Online Presence Without An Iphone? 

 Our wonderful assistant manages our social media, and anything we create is with point and shoot cameras or a desktop. 


Tips On Keeping Marriage Hot When You're In The Third Trimester?

I think a lie that is easy to believe, is that our intimate times must be a home-run every time for it to be worth doing. In the end of my pregnancies, 1. I feel like the three little pigs. All of them. 2. Because of my back, I physically cannot move without help. I don't know if "hot" is what you would use to describe our marriage at that stage. BUT . . . beautiful, sacred, unity through physical intimacy is still a blessing.  

All the changes of pregnancy, postpartum, and baby-I'm-back, keep marriage fun and interesting. Seasons of spontaneity and drama, or just sweetness and comfort, both have their time in place. 

(And if your favorite season of intimacy is third-trimester-mama, more power to you!)


Tips For Having Your Toddler (19 months) Sit Quietly Through Church? 

Each of our four have varied in their difficulty. However, one thing that has proven true for all of them in every age and stage is the importance of midweek training. If we show up to church after a few weeks of travel or hosting people then I am most likely going to be spending most of the service out if the foyer re-establishing the rules and boundaries for my toddler. On the other hand, if we are intentional with our midweek reading times then I can use that time to establish the expectations without being a distractions and spectacle in church.

We also, kinda view it like running. We need to build up the endurance of our children's ability to sit still. Maybe five minutes is what their capacity is now but it is up to the parent to grow their capacity at home.

We do not want the church service to be the time for training. Training happens at home and church reveals where out training is lacking where we have made gains. 

We LOVE hearing your questions! It is so encouraging to know that there are other families out there who are seeking to learn how to best honor God in their marriage, parenting, and homes. 




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